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Victory for Ionia
Aria Breker reporting from IoniaThe fervor of Ionia’s stand for freedom proved to be an unstoppable force two weeks ago when Ionian summoners crushed the Noxian occupiers in a stunning upset on Summoner's Rift. This decisive victory allowed Ionia to reclaim its southern provinces from Noxus.
The first kill of the match was a joint effort by Udyr and Ashe, summoned by Guardsman Bob and Frozt. Ashe’s arrow met its mark to strike the killing blow on Miss Fortune as she was ambushed in the center lane. Continued Ionian efforts to surprise Vladimir, summoned by Poisonidon, failed as he evaded the attacks by bearing the pain of several sanguine pools.
Morgana and Singed, linked to summoners Vorath and Friend, ferociously pressed the advance in bottom lane. In response, summoners NeoIllusions and Poruku put up a solid defense with their champions Amumu and Soraka. Ionian defenders Kennen - guided by summoner Eclipse - and Amumu proved to be an instrumental maelstrom of stuns and damage in every team fight. Summoner Edwy, guiding Sion on the Noxus team, made valiant efforts to halt Ionia’s advance, throwing himself into the fray at one point in an attempt to stop the Ionian team from slaying the dragon.
During a shocking moment during the match, summoner Poisonidon’s link with Noxian champion Vladimir was lost, causing the battlefield to erupt with confusion. During the interruption, the Ionians respectfully called a halt to the battle until Poisonidon was able to re-link with his champion. The League launched an immediate investigation into whether foul play was at hand with the disconnection, but it was ruled that there was no ulterior motive from either side.
In the match’s final moments, Roku, the summoner for Miss Fortune, along with the rest of the Noxian team, mounted a noble last stand against their impending defeat. Miss Fortune exacted revenge for giving up the first kill when she successfully slayed the unstoppable Udyr with help from her team. However, the Noxian defense was ultimately overwhelmed by the zealous Ionians when Soraka led the final push to destroy the nexus in the Noxian base. It was a bittersweet end to the match, with Soraka avenging her poor performance during the original match for Ionia.
In the “Trial for the Isle” seven years ago, Soraka was ruthlessly targeted by Warwick and Singed, both having the insult of Soraka’s curse of lycanthropy fresh on their minds.
The League unanimously voted Ionian summoner Guardsman Bob and League champion Udyr as the MVPs of the match for both their bravery and masterful control of the jungle.
After the battle’s conclusion, the victorious summoners were escorted to the Arcanum Vault, which is a holding room for esoteric magical items secured by the League. The Ionian team was presented with two items for entry onto the Fields of Justice. They selected the, an item that grants its wearers movement speed and cooldown reduction during battle. The item is moving through the final stages of preparation and will soon be introduced to the Fields of Justice in honor of the victors.
Noxian forces have begun their withdrawal from Ionia’s southern provinces, with the citizens of Galrin, Navori, and Shon-Xan erupting in celebration prior to their occupiers vacating completely. These regions have been cut off from the rest of Ionia for 7 years, and Ionians from all over the island have descended upon the regions to share food, supplies, and support during a tumultuous withdrawal. Tearful reunions between long-separated families are a common sight throughout Ionia.
Citizens from all over Ionia gathered in droves at the Lotus Gardens. They anxiously awaited the fate of the burning monk from the Shojin Monastery, who incited the protest by setting himself aflame. With the match having drawn to a conclusion almost two months to the day since he set himself on fire, the bonsai at the monk’s side —a symbol of his remaining life force—had dwindled down to its last two leaves. It was only when the monk was greeted by his sister from the liberated province of Galrin that he allowed the flame to be extinguished. His brethren hastened the monk’s blistered body swiftly back to the monastery for treatment. While it was clear that he would survive, the monk had suffered the loss of his eyes, along with other severe injuries from the intense heat.
The invasion, occupation, protest, and finally liberation in this long chapter of Ionia’s history closes not a moment too soon, with the Time of Snowdown now descended upon Valoran. Ionia’s liberation is indeed a capstone to a truly monumental year in the world of Runeterra.
Zaun Bribery in Kalamanda Exposed
Auras Lam reporting from Kalamanda
An investigation by Kalamanda officials began after a large amount of runes, gems, and techmaturgical devices was found scattered across Reyes’ desk late last week. The valuables were found to contain trace amounts of pollutants, and the compositions of these pollutants allowed Kalamanda authorities to trace the valuables’ origins to Zaun. Despite Reyes’ claims that he was being framed, further investigation revealed that Reyes had been soliciting other council members in an attempt to influence them in Zaun’s favor for the exclusive mining agreement currently under consideration in Kalamanda.
As a result of the attempted bribery, the council has ruled to exclude Zaun from the pool of eligible candidates. Mayor Anson Ridley made the following comment regarding the ruling: “We have made it quite clear to all interested parties that Kalamanda is looking for partners who have our best interests in mind. It is obvious now that Zaun has no interest in a considerate, fair, and mutual partnership with our village.”
This latest development comes as no surprise to the general populace of Kalamanda. It is well known amongst Runeterrans that both espionage and sabotage are considered business as usual in Zaun.
Kalamanda has been on edge due to the recent influx of city-states striking camp along its borders, and the rising tension between the city-states of Demacia and Noxus has been causing the most unease. In an attempt to keep the city-state rivalries in check while ensuring the prosperity of Kalamanda, the council agreed to secure an exclusive mining agreement with a single city-state. Since then, the city-states have been competing vehemently for the contract.
Though Zaun’s presence in Kalamanda is relatively small, it is speculated that Zaun is turning the greatest profit due to its rampant usage of techmaturgical devices to extract the precious minerals. Mining devices are being invented and deployed day and night from the Zaunite camp. Much to the concern of the village residents, the environment in the immediate area already shows signs of decay, with a circle of dying and mutated vegetation widening daily around the Zaunite camps. Residents are blaming Zaun’s careless usage of toxic chemicals, unsafe magic, and experimental machinery. However, with no formal guidelines in place for camp inhabitants due to the rapid influx of activity within the city, the village finds itself at the mercy of Zaunite operations.
Speculations run rampant that this may harm the viability of Noxus’ bid for the exclusive contract, as Noxus and Zaun are well-known allies. The nature in which the bribery was discovered also points to possible involvement from other city-states currently vying for the exclusive contract.
Kalamanda officials are in the process of considering banning Zaun from mining within its borders entirely. A decision is expected within the week.
The Eye Inside
Ram Steed your eye inside the League of Legends
As usual, this reporter brings you the best behind the scenes coverage of the League of Legends. Today, things certainly heat up with this very spicy edition of the Eye Inside!
Sports Exposed, Valoran's leading magazine covering the competitive sports of the world, puts out its highly anticipated swimsuit issue once a year. Usually, this fine volume introduces new models to the world, while also highlighting the cream of the crop. From time to time, they even have celebrities joining in on the fun.
This year's featured celebrity and cover girl is none other than League of Legends champion Morgana, the Fallen Angel! No one saw this coming.
This reporter had the privilege of being on set for one of her photo shoots. It pays to have fans in high places. Morgana was, unsurprisingly, quite forthcoming with whatever was on her mind.
“As I expose myself, I will expose the truth. By showing my scars from war, I show the history of my people. The Judicator lies! The tyrants that rule my world will enslave all that is within their grasp. It is only a matter of time before they spill out here into Valoran. If this is the way to get my message out, then so be it.”
This reporter stands stunned. Never would I have thought that swimsuit modeling could become a political platform, but Morgana's words have moved me in a way this reporter would originally have found impossible. All while wearing something sheer and purple, while smelling of tanning oil. Imagine what she'll do when she gets back to the League!
Whoops! Here's Janna!
Not so long ago, this reporter brought to light an embarrassing event that captured Valoran’s attention. The beloved and glamorous Janna got caught in a nasty scandal when a dishonest ex-boyfriend leaked private bedroom photos of The Storm.
Despite the best efforts of both Janna's people and the League of Legends public relations crew, these compromising pictures of Janna are still in circulation. As this reporter knows well, once something has been leaked to the world, it stays in the world!
Though Janna's standard battle outfit is rather revealing, polls show that this Champion has become a favorite of many with more traditional values. To show the world that she is still worthy of their adoration, Janna has chosen to take on a good-will tour to help with the poverty-stricken areas of Zaun that she once called home.
Janna had this to say: “As a public figure, I have come to realize that I no longer have a private life. I am undertaking this quest to remind people that I am still the same person they have come to love and support, and to remind myself to be that person in every situation.”
All this over a couple lousy lingerie shots? Wow, people, wake up! Get over it! You only wish you looked that good!
Dear Mr. Steed
The cavalcade of fan communication continues!
“Greetings Ram Steed – Being my idol and role-model, the elusive jester Shaco and his life interest me greatly. Could it be possible for you to find him and ask for an interview? I'm dying to hear from him! He must have times when he feels like sharing his adventures with someone. Shaco, you're my hero!" - Stimraug
Dying to hear from him? I certainly hope that's a pun! More to the point, I hope that Shaco doesn't read that. He can be so literal sometimes.
Well, brother Stimraug, you have spoken, and this reporter will deliver.
For the next issue, I, Ram Steed, will brave the very depths of insanity, the darkest places of the League of Legends, to get you an exclusive interview with the mysterious and deadly Shaco, the world's first fully-functioning homicidal comic. This may be one of the bravest things I have ever done, for the very idea chills me to the bone, but this reporter is a man of the people. Such a sacrifice is something I am willing to take on without hesitation!
So keep your eye here for the next issue for news on the The Demon Jester (or my obituary). Hopefully the former!
If these be my last words, then let them be the words by which I lived – The Truth Will Come Out!
If you've got something to say to Ram Steed, mail me personally at the Journal. Some infernal techmaturgical machine will get your message and pass it on to me.
The Mailbag of Justice
Senior Summoner Ralston Farnsley commenting from the Institute of War
The Ionia-Noxus Rematch has generated tremendous excitement from summoners all over Runeterra. In the wake of the match, we would like to congratulate Ionia for their decisive victory over the forces of Noxus. I wonder if we may see some internal changes in the Noxian High Command due to this crushing defeat. And now to the mail!
"In the most recent Journal of Justice article 'General Du Couteau Vanishes', I noticed that allusions to General Du Couteau’s youngest daughter Cassiopeia were made. Is it known if Katarina and Cassiopeia are full blood relatives? Or merely half-sisters?" - Summoner Gazzi
Unfortunately for Cassiopeia, this is a question that will likely be asked quite a bit going forward. Katarina and Cassiopeia are full-blooded sisters, and the General and his wife have been happily married (and faithful) to each other for nearly three decades. Katarina distinguished herself early as the tomboy of the family, embracing a military training regimen while she was still a child. Cassiopeia was noted for her enchanting beauty, and she took on an ambassadorial role until she was...changed. We haven’t pressed her with questions surrounding her transformation, but it seems safe to say it was at unwelcome (at least initially). Our thoughts go out to the Du Couteau family, as the General’s whereabouts remain unknown.
"So...would you be so kind to tell me something about Karthus' pre-lich life and, perhaps, about his political (or whatever else) ambitions? It is also very interesting to know about Karthus’s connection to music, as he is famous for singing some deadly ballads at Howling Marsh, not to mention his nickname. I am sure that official dossier on Karthus don’t correspondent to the true facts that are in the Institute of War disposal." - Loyso, Dark Arts researcher
Unfortunately, we don’t know much more about the lich than you do. He is something of a recluse, and his past isn’t a matter of public record. I did pull him aside after a recent League match to see if he would lend any further insight. The answer he gave was as cryptic as his past, though perhaps more illuminating than anything else we’ve heard.
"In life, there was one worth singing for forever. I have kept my promise, though to some now the song is not as lovely as it was once meant to be."
"I would like to express my gratitude for the privilege at being able to speak with L.B. Briskes during the Ionian celebration to celebrate Irelia's induction as a champion of the League. Also, please let him know he doesn't have to be so sour about everything. I mean in regards to his latest article, I would just like to tell him that there are some things that you just need to enjoy without a hint of a sardonic edge or cynical view." - Dracorya, Ionian Summoner
It brings me a certain joy to forward this sort of feedback to the... eccentric Mr. Briskes. To my great surprise, he furnished me with a response this afternoon.
"Count yourself fortuitous. When the help in the mailroom said I had some mail, I’d assumed it was one of the usual: threats, subpoenas, or homebrewed explosives which people seem to think I don’t have interns open for me. Thus, the odds of me reading your letter were understandably slim. However, as I stumbled into the office this morning, my arrival was timed in perfect harmony with an updraft that happened to reach the skirt of the same intern I typically have “quality check” my suspicious packages. This sight put me in just the mood to rifle through a couple missives as opposed to the typical straight-to-fireplace approach I prefer to employ. Your points were well-taken. In an earnest attempt to reduce my 'sour', I have deprived my whiskey of it, and I must say: it’s just fine. Thank you much for the thought and enjoy your Time of Snowdown!"