• Beatnik Doctor


    One night I was drinking some beer and watching Wrestling Midget Trannies 2 and I came up with this TOTALLY awesome, original champion idea. So I wrote it down on paper, cleaned off the resulting orphan's tears and decided to show it to you guys!

    Genero the Dark Duplifighter

    Innate: Fatal Blow
    Every third consecutive attack to the same target deals bonus Physical Damage equal to a percentage of the target's Maximum Health.
    Bonus Damage: 3% of target's Maximum Health + 0.5% per level (12% of Maximum Health at level 18)

    Q. Blade Blast
    Cost: 60 Mana
    Cooldown: 8 seconds

    ACTIVE: Genero sends his blades out in a line, dealing Physical Damage and Slowing the movement of all enemies hit for 2 seconds. This slow decays over t…

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  • Beatnik Doctor

    And no, it's not the amount of gap closers.

    When looking at the list of champions, and sorting by release date, I've noticed that the earlier champions tend to be a lot more cartoony. We have a homocidal but cute yordle assassin, a little boy riding a yeti dude, a samurai in a goofy glowing outfit with several eyes, a scarecrow, a little girl that summons a flaming teddy bear, the works. Then we get an old dude in a turtle-pace plane and a hulked-up purple doctor. Heck, even Cho'Gath, who's supposed to be a terror, looks silly. And then we have a crying mummy and ROCK SOLID, can't forget those.

    Of course, there were serious champions back then, like Morgana and Jax.

    However, looking at the newer champions, it seems that Riot has grown further…

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  • Beatnik Doctor

    This is a long blog post, fellas.

    If you don't know, by the way, a smurf in this game is an experienced player that creates a new account so he can play against beginning players.

    The first half or so will be about Heroes of Newerth. Yes, it has to do with my topic.

    With DotA2 coming out soon, my friend and I figured that we could get ready by playing some Heroes of Newerth. The game is awesome. The mechanics are stellar. The heroes are pretty damn awesome. I love the couriers as well (Flying monkey? Aww).

    My friend and I, we were both willing to go through hours of games not knowing what the hell we were doing, just so that we could get better.

    My friend gets in a game of HoN before I do. He gets a score of 0/8/2, because he doesn't know what he…

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  • Beatnik Doctor

    > Taking my blogs seriously

    I seriously hope you don't do this.

    Beatnik Doctor 05:44, November 14, 2011 (UTC)

    Hey, fellas. As this community's professional player and advice-guy-bro-man, I've compiled a list of champions that I think... nay, that I KNOW are overpowered. So take a seat and chill. Like Ashe. Geddit? Shut up.

    Face it, stealth is a stupid idea. In laning phase, it is preferable to push the lane incredibly fast so that we get to the enemy tower. We're not going to get to the nexus if the tower's still standing! And then suddenly, EVELYNN shoves a love spike up my buttocks. Not cool. And she's kicking me. What is she, my ex-wife? Stop that, it hurts. And with a big slow to boot! Does Riot really expect me to spend 125 gold on a Visi…

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  • Beatnik Doctor

    I couldn't help wondering about how on-hit effects were common as abilities for all these new champions.

    Think about it, though, aren't they essentially just melee spells?

    For instance, look at Talon's Noxian Diplomacy. They could've made it a melee spell, meaning that you press Q, target an enemy, and slap, you've done damage to them. But they've made it an on-hit ability though. I suppose it's more convenient.

    I've also noticed that people have criticized Wukong for having an on-hit ability - his Crushing Blow. What if it was just a melee-range spell that had to be targeted? Would he be as heavily criticized then?

    It's rather interesting thinking about how if older champions were introduced today, how their abilities would be changed. Look a…

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