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Helloy fellow summoners,
Today I want to talk about stereotypes. They are everywhere, from cops who eat doughnuts, Japanese people who like hentai porn to bad Polish players.
We all know that not all cops like doughnuts, not all Japanese people are porn adicts and not all Polish players are bad. However some people cling to these claims even though they are quite the oposite.
They exist in the League and they can sometimes shape the community in a really funny way.
This is how I see when people play under the influence of stereotypes.
- Hmm, let’s see, I can play solo top, hmm, yes, what to pick, I know DARIUS, THE OWNER OF NOOBS!
- *poof* Hello!
- GAH! *slams on the floor* You again!
- What have you expected, Taylor Swift? Anyway I hope you are not mad from last time when I exploded your head?
- *Amnesia due to headsplosion* What are you...
- Nothing J Just nothing, some random gibberish. I see you are still remmembering me and that is all I need.
- My head hurts in funny way when I see you.
- That is just the weather, nothing too serius XD Anyway let’s see what are you playing *looking*
- *Lock in* Im gonna own those bi**hes.
- I don’t think it is smart to pick Darius. He is not very capable.
- STFU, he is good, has OP ulti, has OP pull and he is very tanky.
- Have it your way, you will regret it.
- *enemy solo top picks Urgot*
- HA! Urgot! LOL he is a noob, we all know Urgot is now Nerfgot. I will stomp him.
- *...Minions have spawned!*
- Alright I will chop that Urgot and carry this game out of division hell.
- *flunk... kaboom* I detect the presence of scum
- *chips away health* Ha-ha that barely hurts.
- *20 minutes later* MERCY, MERCY PLEASE *shik* OW, NOT ANOTHER ONE *shook* OUCH, SORRY FOR THE INSULTS, I DI… *you have been slain*
- What’s wrong Darius? Is he beating you?
- It’s not fair, he pokes hard with those missiles, when I try to hit him he somehow slows me down.
- What about ganks?
- He keeps the lane warded and this noob jungler. OMG, how can it be possible, to lose with Darius *shik* OW!
- You better move back.
- NO! I will stand up to him, no abomination will stand between me and my golden division.
- Have it your way, it’s your funereal.
- DEATH BY MY HAND, DIE YOU *shook* OW! *buttons beeping, teleports in the middle of the top lane, Lee Sin ganks*
- Only I will remain *shik*
- *you have been slain* This team, I lost because of them.
- Always in denial. Why wouldn’t you just accept the fact, you know nothing about Darius, you were led to believe he is “OP” and easy to play.
- Not its not true, in fact Urgot is OP, he needs a nerf, stupid Morello.
- WHAT?! Urgot?! People used to call him Nerfgot. How could you possibly say he is OP. Admit it, you suck.
- *DEFEAT!* See, they threw a game, fu..ing noobs.
- Maybe because you fed Urgot with 10 kills.
- No its totally this Warwick noob, look at his feeder score *7/5/6*
- Uhhh, yeah… So what are you going to do now?
- I know *Shop, refund Pulsfire Ezreal skin* Sorry Ez, you are now useless since that attack speed debuff nerf. I will buy some other OP champions since Darius is…
- You mean you suck.
- NO, Darius is overnerfed, period, I can’t suck. Now shut up, I need to concentrate. *ZAC, Rumble, Lissandra, Elise* Ok, I bought every currently OP champion, Platinum tier, HERE I COME!
- Uhh, could you explain to me how you determined the “OP” factor of those champions.
- Simple, ZAC and Lissandra are new champions, new champions are OP because RIOT wants from people to buy them, so they make them OP on purpose, Rumble has highest winrate, that is 100% because of his opness and Elise, man did you see her kit? She has OP on her forehead.
- Oh boy, you are in for a world of pain.
- Here we go. *ZAC game, goes jungle, sucks with build, defeat* OMG, stupid noobs, I was the best out there and my team was soooo stupid.
- What makes you think like that, let me see. Oh my GOD! You bought Infinity Edge on ZAC, are you insane?!
- STFU, SIV HD bought Infinity Edge, he is pro.
- SIV HD does spoof videos, Jesus, you are a victim of severe brain damage. How do you think Infinity Edge might benefit Ability Power based champ.
- I must try another game *Rumble, goes on top, terribly misses all skillshots, surrender at 20* OMG I AM THE MOST UNLUCKY PERSON IN THE UNIVERSE, ANOTHER NOOB TEAM.
- ADMIT IT ALREADY, YOU SUCK AT THIS GAME.
- No, I am fine, I will now go to wiki page and complain about how Rumble is stupid and needs a rework. People must know, Rumble needs a rework.
- Oh boy, you are really asking for full flame wars.
- But first I am going to play Elise and Lissandra *Dominion game, picks Elise, still plays Summoners rift and chases every kill and farm, ends up last*...
- Annnnnnnd, let me see, OH GOD, you were the absolute worst in both teams, you really needs to practice.
- Stupid Dominion, bunch of nolife kids who play 24/7 and their mothers who pay them for every champion.
- Maybe they earned their money by themselves.
- Its not true.
- In fact, your mother gave you 100 euros...
- Oh look, I have Lissandra to to try.
- I was talking to you about those...
- No, no, no, we finished discussing (looking ashamed) let’s play.
- Stereotypes everywhere.
- Nevermind, try Lissandra at ARAM, I heard she is good at that map, find a custom game with blind pick.
- *Game loading... Allied team has 3 golden players, enemy team has nothing*
- Oh boy, we have 3 gold players, we are going to own these noobs *FIRST BLOOD*
- *Allied team to Lissandra* You stupid moron, why facechecking, they have Fiddle, you gave FB.
- Oh, sorry, laaaaaaag.
- *30 minutes into the game, enemy Fiddlesticks is very good and is carrying his team, Lissandra however missed each and every skillshot, just as like playing with Elise* Lissandra you noob, you miss everything, and why don’t you buy tenacity.
- I can’t I already have boots.
- But Fiddle has 3 seconds of fear.
- STFU noob, don’t tell me how to plfffffffffffffffffffffffffffff *You have been slain*
- Good job with flashing... Really good job, next time stay under turret and type.
- *A summoner has disconnected*
- I can’t play with these noobs, I am going to play on my smurf account, I will own those noobs.
- What about champions, you don’t have them on your smurf account.
- Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me, MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!
I hope you enjoyed, moral of the story is never beleive in stereotypes and whatever you do, first consider your mistakes, then consider mistakes of your teammates. And above all else, don’t other people names just because they are better.
HINT: Next „how to“ will be centered around a peculiar syndrome, I won’t reveal much.