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Volume 1, Issue 2
FORMARE VENEFICIUS EST FORMARE FATUM
30 March, 23 CLE
Howling Abyss's Opening
Preparations of yet another scandal?
Five days ago, Vessaria Kolminye has sent a notice to the Barbarian King Tryndamere and the three Freljord Princesses Ashe, Sejuani and Lissandra to discuss the opening of the Howling Abyss, as two nexus crystals have been found quite recently. Despite having a temporary non-aggression pact applied to the meeting, Sejuani of the Winter's Claw tribe failed to show up, and instead represented by her tribe's messenger Sironos.
The meeting concluded in three days. All parties agreed to the opening of the Fields of Justice and a ceremony will be held once the preparations are done within two weeks.Right before the end of the meeting, Sironos declares:
"Ashe, Leader of the Avarosan Alliance, I may have agreed to the opening of the Howling Abyss, but that does not mean we of the Winter's Claw approve of your rule over our lands in any way. Your weak ideals will only get all of us killed in the end, both from the hungry eyes of the Noxian army and the dreaded Ice Witch.
Lissandra of the Avarosan Frostguard Division, you and I do not really have a grudge, but you are deluded. Our people are dying to the Ice Witch every day, yet Ashe still pretends everything is lovely and well. Growing grain while reducing defenses? No wonder Eastern Freljord is so ransacked by trolls. Think over this once again, for the sake of Freljord's future. Ashe is not a good leader, and I will take her down if I must.
The aftermath generated quite a commotion among the Freljord population, and conspiracy theorists are already on a rampage, declaring that the Institute of War is "about to pull another Heywan Relivash".
This will be my first and also the last article I will ever write for the Journal of Justice Overhauled. Tobias Drumm, pen off.
The Life of the Secret Weapon
Zac's supple story revealed
As stated last week, I, Ram Steed, will interview the Secret Zaunite Weapon, and hope that things do not get slimy. To be honest I'm more nervous than the interviewee, I still have the trauma of a stiletto stuck barely centimeters into my heart.
The results wasn't as bad as I thought, to be honest.
Zac's InterviewRam: Good evening, Zac. Nice to meet you.
Zac: Good evening.
Ram: Should I start the interview now?
Zac: Hang on, how rude of me. (frowns) Do you want a drink?
Ram: A glass of water is fine enough.
Zac: Waiter, get me a glass of water and a chocolate sundae, with extra whipped cream! Alright, you may go ahead.
Ram: Alright, can you tell the readers about your childhood?
Zac: (smiles) It's a long story, so I'll cut it short. I was born in a lab, eventually gaining sentience. My original fate is to be a pure combat machine. I got subjected to a lot of experiments. It nearly drove me crazy. My parents know of my condition and they snuck me some sweets to calm down my nerves, but they (the scientists) don't like fun, and was about to strip them of their jobs. So my mum planned a lab breakout and my dad readied a vehicle to escape. From then on I lived and studied like a normal school kid, kinda missed the days now that I think of it.
Ram: Wouldn't the children be afraid of you?
Zac: Nah, I was a cute blob back then, they liked playing with me since I'm so flexible. We played games like trampoline, jump rope and rubber ball.
Ram: You and your parents were constantly pursued by the Zaunite scientists before, how did your parents managed to elude them for so long and yet still be able to study like a normal child?
Zac: Ah, my milkshake's here. (drinks) Where was I? Aaaah, yes. My parents moved to a faraway place and changed their faces and names, while they would never expect me to be sent to a school to learn. As my mum and dad were scientists with a high salary back then, they paid the school handsomely to keep my presence secret. But eventually the word still got out, and my parents were caught.
Ram: So what did you do when your parents got caught?
Zac: I was scared at first, hiding in that huge stuffed bear in the living room watching my parents getting caught. But later I resolved to save them, and pursue my freedom. I assaulted their lab and saved my parents. They tried to catch me with net guns, but they must have underestimated my flexibility - I simply weave through the nets. Anything related to me in the lab was destroyed, and once my parents are free I can from then on pursue further studies and more tasty sweets throughout Valoran.
Ram: What's your favourite sweet?
Zac: That would be a tie between cupcakes and treacle puddings. I like really fluffy cupcakes and really squishy puddings.
Ram: People seem to have a negative first impression when you're first introduced because you're a Zaunite, what do you have to say to them?
Zac: (frowns) Now that's just a crude stereotyping of a Zaunite. Just because you have people like Singed, Twitch and Dr. Mundo doesn't mean that all Zaunites are uneducated pollution-creating ruffians that could care less about the people and the environment. Look at Janna, she's a Zaunite as well, yet most people thought she's of Piltover descent. I'm pretty sure the League will know of more Zaunite superheroes soon enough, things can change.
Ram: How far can you stretch?
Zac: Well, (stretches left arm across the avenue and into the counter of the opposite shop) twice as long as this, and that's just my left arm elasticity.
Ram: Anything else you wish to add?
Zac: I may not be living in Zaun now, but I wish the future of Zaun will be promising, may more Zaun bakeries and confectionery stores be quality-assured. I had enough of nitro-glycerin flavored cupcakes they produce these days.
Ram: Alright, thank you for your time.
Zac: You are welcome. (bows) Oh and do you know of any good confectionery stores?
Ram: You can try Sinful Succulence.
So that's the results of the interview! We look forward to what Zac can unleash in the Fields of Justice with his flexible abilities. He seems to be a really nice guy. Ram Steed, signing off!
New Karma Attracts Bad Karma
Threat letter by the Dark Sovereign
Just yesterday morning, the elders have received a blue letter, with a dark mark to signed to the right of the mail. The contents are as follows:
The Ionian leaders are weak, you and I both know this. Yet you as the leader of Ionia, shines brilliantly out of the miserable bunch, and with your recent training in the mountains, you have become even more powerful than before.
With this I propose a challenge. You and I will have a duel to prove who is the strongest of them all, on THAT location, five days from now. Should you win, I will give you my highest respects, and I will henceforth withdraw from Ionia permanently; should you lose, you will part away your power to me, regardless if you are willing or not.
You may wish to decline this challenge and not show up on THAT location, but I will forever treat you as a hopeless weakling, and I will make sure the government will soon fall under my power.
Simply answer your reply by showing up on the designated place, I will wait.
So there you have it, we do not know where they will fight, and Karma simply ignored whatever questions the people has thrown to her. I worry of Ionia's future, she has already suffered from the Noxian invasion, and now we're in-fighting between each other. We can only rely on Karma's decision.
On a lighter note, this newseems fun to blow at. Too bad the Institute of War premises cannot be entered anymore.
Runeterra's Shady Future
The recent influx of Shadow Isle champions
The amount of conspiracies conspiracy-conspiring conspiracy theorists conspire these days are a conspiracy itself. In addition to the stories they can pull out in Freljord's Fields of Justice opening preparations, they also question how the League is able to recruit Champions from the Void and the Shadow Isles.
With the recently remarkable amount of them added into the League such as Hecarim, Elise and Thresh, and not to mention that mini-scandal Karthus pulled out, it's surprising that their stories do make some sense. Take for example, these questions:
"Why on earth is the League still welcoming them when most of them are clearly seeking to take over Valoran?"
"Are they biding their time?"
"Will the Void and the Shadow Isles compete over each other over the land?"
"Will they ultimately form an alliance with each other and bring the League of Legends down?"
As I drink the remainder of my Graggy Ice Special from this secret compartment and Bligejack Daniel hid inside the ink I use to write with, I ponder over my previous history of interviewing the Void champions such as Kassadin, Kog'Maw, and Cho'Gath, the answer is pretty simple, and there's no need to make up so many theories - They are simply just mad people.
By the way, nice art there, editor-in-chief.
The Mailbag of Justice Overhauled
Let's see which mails are lucky enough today!
At the moment, all is well, but we're currently short on staff, so for this week I would like to offer fellow readers both humans and yordles vacancies for reporters and especially artists. Due to the images I used are sued by the Institute of War, I have to design them myself instead, so the Journal of Justice Overhauled desperately require them. Tobias Drumm resigned for personal reasons, Aria Berker and Richor Ebony declined my requests, and Kaldera Cardine is very busy at this moment.
- Three vacancies for city-states Piltover, Bilgewater, Zaun, Demacia, Noxus and Freljord each
- Two vacancies for city-states Ionia and Bandle City each
- Six artists
- Two miscellaneous reporters
Your tasks will be light, you don't have to do a lot of work, but your writing must be of high quality. Send in your resume to me including your own portrait, which will be used in future JoJO's if you're hired, and a sample article of whichever topic you wish. If you wish to apply as an artist, draw something about League of Legends, and at least better than me. Once again, I require artists the most, or you will be enduring artwork from Yours Truly in the future.
"WTH man? Is this supposed to be a joke?" - Anonymous
No, this is not a joke, this is a Journal of Justice Overhauled. Next time however, write your name when posting a question.
"Wait, I'm confused. Could someone give me a straightforward (sorries but I didn't get whatever references or analogies you put in your post :P) explanation of what this is?" - Archonell
I see, you must be new to the Journal of Justice. Let's just say this is another publisher with a different but similar name, unofficial and is not supported by the Institute of War in any way.
"Can I be a reporter for the Journal of Justice? :DD" - Skyshifter
If you want to be a reporter of the Journal of Justice, I have to say that you can't. That journalism organization has already been taken down because of Ralston Farnsley's scandal. If you wish to be a reporter for the Journal of Justice Overhauled however, simply send in your resume containing your portrait and a sample article of perhaps 40-60 words.
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